heckinooc | TDM 006: OUT WITH THE OLD

TDM 006: OUT WITH THE OLD

[ SEE GAME NAVIGATION TO READ UP ON HECK GAME BEFORE PLAYING IF YOU SO DESIRE ]

A, Garden Level - Ice Breakers--Literally!
[It's winter in the Garden of Good and Evil. . .but still a beautiful garden! Despite the snow and frost, all the fruits are ripe and delicious, and any flowers peaking through the snow are fragrant and bright. However, any new souls showing up, temporary or permanent, may stumble upon some patches of ice. . .in fact, they're ice floats!

If you're lucky you may just raise an eyebrow and easily jump back to solid ground, easy-peezy. But if you're UNLUCKY, the ice float grows and expands, trapping you on the float. . .until some frost appears on the ice.

Break the Ice with some conversation!

That's right, the ice won't break until you strike up a convo with someone else! The ice is nearly see through, so you can easily catch the attention of passerbys, or maybe someone else trapped on an ice float! Any convo is fair game, and eventually your ice prison will melt away.

That aside, explore the garden or the other levels! And maybe see if your form has changed a bit.]

B, Heaven or Hell - On the Spot!
[While you're here, you're free to explore the cities in either heaven or hell! There's a light powdery snow that sprinkles over the Heavenly gates, emphasizing the sparkling gold and white architecture of the landscape. Coffee shops and bakeries may lure you in with the aroma of warm treats, or cute animals for you to cuddle up and pet. Or maybe you just want to be pampered at the hotel--it's swanky as hell! And speaking of hell, while it's MUCH colder down there (hell freezing over and all that), it's still lively as ever. New Years parties will be popping off all month, and bars offer endless shots for first time visitors! There's something for everyone.

Also in both areas there are an abundance of hot springs right now. What's that about?? Don't worry about it.

What you SHOULD worry about are the sheep-like imps or cherubs that descend upon you suddenly, poking a mic in your face!

If you're in Heaven, a cherub asks: We're polling our temporary guests! Do you think those in hell are SCUM who DESERVE TO BURN FOR ALL ETERNITY or like, nah?

If you're in Hell, an imp asks: We're polling our temporary assholes! Do think think Heaven is full of holier than thou HYPOCRITICAL PRICKS that deserve a holy GUILLOTINE to humble their asses??

Also: your answer is broadcasted! Or the mic just makes your answer echo out, so anyone is free to badger or agree with you back. Or a cherub/imp steals your issued phone and sends your answer as a mass text. THEY ARE SLIPPERY.

Of course, you can just walk away. You're trying to enjoy your afterlife, dangit!]

C, Wildcard
[Bring your own prompts here!!]

OOC NOTES:
-This TDM is open to all! You do NOT need to join the comm to play in it!
-This will be the TDM for Jan/Feb, but you're free to use old ones if you prefer, or make your own prompts!
-As a reminder, THIRD CHARACTER APPS are now street legal!
-Post questions for the mods here
-Remember, playing in the TDM does NOT guarantee your entry or app being accepted into the game proper later down the line!
-Apps open!! Be sure to read the rules linked there and check the current taken list!
-For current or new potential players: TDMs count as game canon AND threads may be used for AC if you wish! It's optional! You can do a whole thread and then decide it's not canon if you want!
-Remember regardless of your alignment, you are free to travel to whatever level you wish!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ooc: some info in journal, i havent settled on a hard and fast canon point, if you are okay with Arcane s2 spoilers please lmk in the subject or something]

A- Ice Breaker

[Well, here we are. Standing on a block of ice in a frosty garden. Not exactly a familiar landscape, or one that was expected. At first, Vi starts to slide down the side of it on her boots, like she's grinding a rail ~~(muffled city escape in the distance)~~ but she gets down to a lower ledge only for a railing of ice to grow up around it, as if trying to prevent her from falling.]

[She vaults it and slides further down, only to be blocked once again, by a wall of ice higher than her head. She growls and stomps her foot.]

What the hell is this?!

[She kicks the ice, chipping off a very small amount of it and not really accomplishing much. She wishes for her gauntlets. Even Vander's old mining fists, would probably be enough. So instead she just, leans against the ice, and waits. Is the ice slowly melting and seeping into her clothes? Yes. She's probably shivering pretty quickly by the time anyone sees her.]

B- On the Spot, Hell

[Homegirl heard there was free booze for newbies and she was on that that stink on a hog. She's done more shots than is wise, and is in turns playfully ribbing at folks to try to get someone to fight her and brooding at the bar. She's in the second state when a zippy little imp flies up to her and shoves the mic in her face.]

[She is absolutely drunk enough and bitter enough for this to be a terrible idea, which is probably why it picked her. Her words slur slightly and many come out through her teeth like a hissing animal.]

Anyone who lives in a big fancy city over top of others is a fascist asshole who deserves to eat shit. If I've learned anything in my life it's that nothing good comes of an upper city and a lower city. Who even decides who's "virtuous" enough [She says this with a big eye roll and the most dramatic hand air quotes] to go to "heaven" anyway. Who decides what actions are justified and who's just a criminal? The people who already have money and power, that's who.

[She lost the plot there a little on a metaphysical sense, but she doesn't notice, returning to her liquor.]

C- Rooftops, Hell

[Sleeping in that swanky ass hotel is a no-go for this one. It's too fancy, too soft, too weird, too enclosed. Thankfully the swanky appointments means the windows are huge, so it's not much trouble for Vi to climb out of the window and scramble up the side of the building like a lizard.]

[She climbs up onto the roof with a satisfied groan, stretching her back and her arms as she looks in each direction. Cracks her neck. Then after a moment of stillness she takes off like a shot, running to an edge and kicking off, leaping to the next roof and keeping her momentum. She slides down a pipe, and tiptoes along a balcony, laughing almost silently to herself as the rush of wind passes her ears and pushes her hair back.]

[She runs across one particularly flat, wide roof, and at the ledge realizes that the jump to the next one is a little father than she can probably make. She's going too fast to brake without going off the edge either way, though, so she commits, pounding her foot into the rain gutter and taking off, arms behind her, legs tucked up tight. Her stomach bottoms out through her feet, heart soaring into her throat, and she realizes she probably cannot make it...]

[When a sound like someone sharply shaking out leather hits the air, and suddenly she feels weightless, slowed and floating, and she lands on the far roof, taking a couple of short steps. A pair of oily black and red wings, leathery and batlike, float behind her back, slowly shrinking down to the size of her forearms now that they aren't actively in use. She turns and they turn with her, as if attached, though there is some visible air between her back and the wings, if you care to peek.]

Woah, what was that?

Edited (adding some ooc deets also lol first) 2025-01-02 02:45 (UTC)

[Oh no! An ice flow? At this time of year, at this time of place, localized entirely within the garden?? On the anniversary of the day Misery was rescued from an ice flow? What are the chances!

All of that to say, there's at least one little angel darting over these troubled waters. Ruby can't just sit back and enjoy a nice snow picnic when there could be people stuck in the ice. And stuck they are- oof.

She was about to turn back when the sight of something red cut through all the white. Floating on over, she exclaims-]

Hello? Anyone there?

[What in the damn fuck-]

Uh, hello? Yeah. What the hell is up with this place?

[She squints through the ice as if that will make the little flying girl-sprite-cat thing make any more sense. The ice distorts the image, but that isn't exactly the real problem.]

Hell yeah.

[ Says a cute widde hellified gal from off to the side. She loves this kind of thing! Even if it's not quite one-hundred percent on the topic, and Runa hasn't exactly read any Theory, society sure looks like a bunch of this shit from her perspective!

She slides up next to the cool-ass drunk with a much weaker drink of her own. ]

You sound like you've been through it with that kinda thing.

[ Now actually talking to her directly. ]

[Icy grey eyes cut to the side to get a glance at Runa as she sidles up.]

Very observant of you.

[She isn't trying to be bitchy on purpose. It's not you, it's her, etc.]

Oh, how surly.

[ Runa doesn't seem to be put off by this. ]

Really, anyone deciding that this or that person should go to Hell...

[Points for being so unfazed, truly. Pointing out directly how she's acting does get Vi to chill a little, though it doesn't fix her mood. She rolls her neck to crack it and rotates her shoulders, sitting upright rather than hunching over the bar like a gargoyle.]

Or even deciding what Hell is. Plenty of Pilties who saw the deepest parts of the lanes would have called that Hell, but for us it was home. This place, it doesn't seem so bad, either.

[Except for the fact that it's supposed to be bad. Really, Vi never gave cosmology or religion much thought in her life. She prayed to Janna for fair winds and to guide the lost souls of her loved ones like everyone else in Zaun, but that's not really the same vibe as all of this.]

Who're you anyway?

[ Runa's been working at a bar in Hell for months. Vi is actually pretty relaxed compared to the 'locals', but Runa felt the need to tease her for getting so fired up, too. ]

I get it. Here, it's not as lonely as what I was living through.

[ For at least a little while. ]

I'm Runa. Just another one of the poor souls stuck here 'accidentally'.

Yeah? It's at least not isolated here.

[A person can be lonely even in a crowd, but that is decidedly not the type of lonely that Vi is used to.]

Been here that long? Is there some kind of usual turnaround time?

[She doesn't sound that in a hurry to get back, though]

There sure is a lot of activity!

[ You can say that at least. ]

...getting close to a year now, which is kinda messed up ain't it?

I

While normally Blitzø would be all over talking to new people, he's cold, and he fucking hates the cold, and being trapped on an ice float is making him flash back to some very unpleasant penguin interactions and he is generally NOT ABOUT IT.

So instead of trying to just talk to someone like a normal person he's trying to chip away at the ice with a knife. It's... not very effective. "Ugh, Satan fucking dammit!" He hurls the knife at the wall and slumps against the wall, then veers away from it with a hiss, tail sticking straight up. "I hate the cold! This is such bullshit!"

II

Blitzø has not stopped hating the cold despite being no longer trapped in ice, and now hell is frozen over which is the BIGGEST BULLSHIT OF THEM ALL. Heaven has snow still, but at least it's not as cold.

More importantly, among the cuddly animals available, he's found a pony. His tail lashes back and forth excitedly. This is officially the greatest day of his life. After an appropriate amount of time cooing over how beautiful she is and how much he loves her, he settles down and starts braiding her mane.

"I'm gonna call you Staple Gun. A perfect horse name for a perfect horse."

When a cherub catches up to him and asks about people in hell deserving to burn, he smiles wickedly, sharp teeth gleaming. "I really think you should try."

He isn't expecting his words to echo around the way they do, but fuck it. He stands by them.

...for real, though. At least then he'd be WARM.

III

Heaven gets lame after a while even though his new best friend Staple Gun is there. So it's back to hell, which feels way more like home. Especially once he finds one of those bars with endless shots. Those help warm him right up. It's not long before he hits the dance floor and the press of bodies helps warm him up even more.

"DANCE WITH ME, BITCH!" he yells over the music when he finds a promising partner. He snags their arm and starts to pull them onto the dance floor.

Edited (oops html) 2025-01-01 20:39 (UTC)

Oh good grief, of course there's got to be some sort of drama in Heaven and Hell at this point and she's huffing out a breath when she hears this newest broadcast. Does she agree with any of it? Of course not, Heaven and Hell is still a weird concept for her given how ancient Egypt tended to work in general. So, well, hopefully the imp isn't going to be too bothered.

Bothered by what? The fact that there is a 5'9" woman casually making her way over, wrapped up in a light blue jacket that only shows her draconic wings tucked to her back, the tail swaying behind her, the scales that peak out from just under the collar of her jacket, and the stupid-ass halo. Once she's there she's going to just casually scoop him up from the cherub with a smile with a hint of fang showing. "How about we don't threaten our guests, hm?~" Her tone is soft and seemingly sweet if one doesn't pay attention to the clear threatening undertone of it all.

Sorry, Blitzø, you're going to have to deal with the weird dragon lady for a little bit.

He isn't sure what he's expecting, but an... angel? Dragon? Dragon angel? Picking him up like he's nothing is not it. He flails and hisses like a cat, trying to simultaneously wriggle out of her grip and also turn and bite her or scratch her, tail angrily lashing from side to side. It's not a very coordinated counter attack.

"Hey, fuck off, bitch, that was barely a threat."

Edited (needed a feral icon) 2025-01-02 05:13 (UTC)

Dragon angel is close enough. Luckily she's... sort of familiar with how cats work given she's seen too many of them in her short life to not know how all of that goes. And his flailing and hissing isn't too much of a big deal and probably not the best that his scratching and biting actually gets him to hit scales that... are not the most pleasant to be hitting with either of those things.

"Do you want them to leave or not?" She manages to hiss back at him, how she's not slipping into her native tongue while doing this is anyone's guess. Though she's certainly letting him scratch and bite at the blue-white scales that are covering her arms. It's fine, she's fine, don't worry about it.

This is getting him nowhere. Time for Plan B. He stops struggling and instead shoots her a sly smirk. "Why, trying to get me alone? I didn't realize this was that sort of pick up. Okay, I can get behind this... Mommy."

A pick up? Mommy? That might work on other people, but it's just utterly confusing to her instead, such is the perks of being from a time before those words were really a think. And she's immediately furrowing her brow at him with a frown, but also not letting him go for the moment.

"Why would I want to get you alone?" All the anger in her voice, the annoyance, is entirely gone to pure confusion instead. Barking up the entirely wrong tree, Blitz, sorry about that.

The Cherub gets it. The Cherub is hightailing it out of here immediately before this demon can scar their pure innocent angel mind.

Blitzø gives her a flat look cause wow, usually that gets some sort of reaction, at least. "For fucking," he says, tone dry. "You know, sex?" He makes a ring with the fingers of one hand and pokes the finger of his other hand through it. "Is that... not a thing people do up here?"

At first the "fucking" comment doesn't seem to quite parse, but sex seems to and she just rolls her eyes instead. "Not something I got to do before I died, unfortunately." Though she is absolutely going to let him down, but she's being nice about it and making sure he gets his feet on the ground before letting him go properly. "From what I've been told, the last time I was alive was... considered "ancient" compared to most of the other people here."

He takes several steps away once he's on the ground, still eyeing her warily. She doesn't seem to intend harm, but that doesn't mean he's gonna go around trusting her.

"And you haven't tried it out now that you're dead? Wow, Heaven is boring." It's a good thing there's no risk of Blitzø ever ending up there permanently.

Dude, Staple Gun is such a sweet ass name for a pony!

[Here comes a cat person with tiny devil wings and two little horns sticking out of her skull. Mae seems in great spirits despite the freezing cold.]

I think I saw a goat earlier! I wanted to take him home.

Thanks, I've been brainstorming good horse names since I was a kid. And also pony names.

[Congrats, Mae, you're officially Blitzø's favorite. Besides Staple Gun, of course.]

...don't let a goat into your house. Those little shits are worse than any demon I've fought, fucked, or been.

I have a friend who named a possum "Rabies" because it's the thing all possums are afraid of, but I don't think that would make a good pony name. Since ponies can't get rabies.

[.... Can they??]

Wait, really? But they're so cute! Well, except for their eyes. But it's not like they can help that.

Rabies... is that like hellbies?

[He doesn't pay attention to Earth diseases there are too many of them and he can't actually use them for assassinations.]

If you think "cute" means "not capable of grisly murder" then I have a bunch of friends you should hope never to meet in a darkened alley at night.

Maybe? I don't know what hellbies are but they sound similar.

...

Are you implying that you have cute murder friends??

I mean, I am an assassin. If I didn't have any cute murder friends, I'd be pretty lonely.

Really?? So you like kill people for your job?

I never killed anyone. [She pauses.] -I mean on purpose. I did hospitalized a kid when I was in school though.

Nice. We all gotta start somewhere!

[He flashes her an encouraging thumbs up.]

Yeah, and I run my own business. IMP--Immediate Murder Professionals. Wanna hear the jingle?

Oh uh - sure! Let's hear it!

[Should she be worried?

She should probably be worried.

...

She's not gonna worry about it.]

[ He starts to sing, wiggling his fingers like he's conducting an imaginary orchestra. ]

When you want somebody gone and you don't want to wait too long
Call the Immediate Murder Professionals
Hand grenade or cyanide, we'll make it look like suicide
The Immediate Murder Professionals
We do our job so well because we come straight up from Hell
We'll kill your husband or your wife, we'll even let you keep the knife
We're the Immediate Murder Professionals!

Damn, that's pretty good! So you just like, kill people and get away with it? I mean I guess you do because it's Hell and all.

[She wonders if it's bad that she's become more desensitized to this kinda stuff since she landed herself in Hell.]

Question - do you only kill people's exes or do you like, know how to kill bigger stuff. Like maybe a cosmic horror?

A young woman with a blue military uniform, a futuristic energy pistol clipped to her belt and a shiny silver halo above her head has taken notice of him. She doesn't have the excuse of being a newcomer, but she's logically-minded, and she wants to help.

'I can try to melt it?' she offers, genuine concern in her eyes. Tayrey once led an expedition to an ice planet, and while she can't say for certain if angels and demons can suffer from hypothermia, she doesn't want to take any chances. She steps closer, pulling her warm wool coat around her.

'You'd have to stay very still,' she cautions him. Going from freezing to burning probably wouldn't be much fun.

"Eh, go nuts. Earth fire can't hurt me." Though he's not actually sure if that's what this woman is using. Not least because she's yet another angel, and he's pretty sure heavenly fire would sting like a bitch.

What in the world? It isn’t enough that he is grabbed without warning, but it happens to be by someone who left this place recently. He places a hand against his chest to stop him, giving him a calculating glance.

“I will, but I’m going to ask you to refrain from making any sexual innuendos until the dance is over. You may not remember me, but I remember you, Blitzø. My name is Michael.”

Not that ever adhered to using to using it before, plus he thinks his stipulations might be a big ask for someone like him. Nonetheless, he lets himself get pulled along and, once they have found their own little spot on the floor, he offers him his hand to take.

“If the terms are acceptable, lead the way.” If Blitzø has ever seen Lucifer before, Michael and him are nearly identical save for his angelic nature and more muscular frame. To make it easier to move, he lets all six wings disappear behind him but the halo remains.

Why is an angel in Hell, in a bar? No worries, he asks himself that constantly.

...Blitzø is too drunk for this.

He's pretty sure he'd be too drunk for this even if he was completely sober. He stands there blinking at Michael as he tries to process exactly what's going on. The idea that someone remembers him that he doesn't remember isn't that surprising--he doesn't give enough fucks to remember most people--though he's pretty sure he'd remember meeting an angel. On the other hand, he was just almost executed on live TV. Who's to say how many people know him that he hasn't even met?

And also negotiating a dance like it's a business contract makes it immediately less fun.

"So what, I can make as many as I want after the dance?"

[A: Ice Breakers]
[Hm, talk about your issues, or do some mild platforming? Not a problem for the hero of Hyperion. He's all too happy to take one step off the ice flow and watch the rest of it go.

Was someone still out there? Huh, that's probably not - oooh, there's a party over here. Time to mingle.]

Heh. You see that? Ahhh, there's totally people stuck out there in the ice. Ehhh, sucks to be them, I guess. Or not. I dunno.

[He's having a good time, and that's what matters most.]

[B: Heaven]
[Well "Heaven" - since that's what they're calling it - is everything Jack wants. Namely, he's being waited on hand and foot. It's enough praise and care that he's held off on trying to buy the hotel so far (it just needs a few more busts of himself, and maybe a casino). He's definitely still got some big plans for this place but, for now, those can go on the backburner.

He was just about to check out one of those special hot springs they've been talking about before he was interrupted by a nosy cherub. Normally, he might have strangled someone for less, but today... this was in his personal interest.]

No, actually I'm glad you asked. See, back home - where I should be, mind you - I was trying to deal with this whole world of unruly, annoying, and barbaric bandits. Real dangerous types. The kind that'll rip your face off and have a skin pizza party, right after they betray you to your face and ruin your secret weapon -

[He pauses, flickering with a dangerous electricity.]

The point is, the sooner all those scum are taken care of? The better. You know, I might just have some ideas on how to do it.

I can't help 'em.

[ Runa doesn't have any big flappy demon wings, and all mind control could do is make them dive into instant-death ice water. ]

They'll be fine-ish.

[ She's not new but the new arrivals getting thrown into some dumb shit makes for a moments spectacle. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

TDM 006: OUT WITH THE OLD

Vi(olet) | Arcane | (its ein again hello)

A- Ice Breaker

B- On the Spot, Hell

C- Rooftops, Hell

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Blitzø | Helluva Boss

II lmfao

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II

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I

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Handsome Jack | Borderlands

A