heckinooc | TDM 001!!

[ SEE GAME NAVIGATION TO READ UP ON HECK GAME BEFORE PLAYING IF YOU SO DESIRE ]

A) MAY I OFFER U PIE IN THIS TRYING TIME(GARDEN LEVEL)
[OOPS YOU DIED. WELCOME TO THE GARDEN OF GOOD AND EVIL. If you're new here, have a sheep cherub or imp slap a "HI MY NAME IS--" sticker on you, and frantically explain "DON'T WORRY, WE'RE WORKING ON IT, WE'LL HAVE YOU OUT HERE....AT...SOME POINT..." Wack. Also, you may noticed that your body may or may not have changed. What's up with that??? Who cares, at least you have as spiffy new cell phone! You're also told you're free to take the elevators up to Heaven or down to Hell. Good luck!

In the mean time--join the garden party that's going on! Or at least, it seems like a party?? Except all they are serving is pie. Apple pie. Blueberry pie. The classics. For you more Carnivorous types, there's stuff like mince pie, and...the name is smudged, but maybe don't eat that one unless you're a cannibal.

But along with a variety of normal pies, if you accidentally eat a weird pie, your character might experience the following:
Vinegar Pie - It's tasty but suddenly you're compelled to blurt out an Insult or ruthlessly tease the next person you see.
"Sweet" Potato - If you're a normally grumpy or aggro character, this pie will suddenly make you want to be more affectionate! This can be anything from wanting to hold hands or saying genuine nice things.
Humble Pie - Suddenly you feel complimenting or praising others and might downplay your own achievements, or insult yourself.

You can probably shake off the effects, but hey. Free pie!! ]

B) LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE (HELL LEVEL)
[TIME TO EXPLORE. Today in the Hell Level, the Hotel (Ho-hell? Helll-tel? Okay just Hotel) it's time for spring cleaning! Wait, didn't they just have that? An Imp says yes, but this is a different type of cleaning. Time to TAKE OUT THE TRASH!!!!

Which is to say, out of no where you might receive a PUNCH in the face by a local, or an imp! If the latter it's like being bapped by a sick little lamb. Still, even if a local punches you, you suddenly heal immediately? That's right, TODAY ONLY, this is a 'get into a scrap injury free' spring holiday, and you can rough house as much as you want with each other today in the Hotel, and NO DAMAGE will remain! Ever wanted to get cut in half and suddenly stitch back together? WELL TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY.

If you're not into PG rated guro however, why don't you try exploring:
-The clubs! The nightlife in hell is FANTASTIC and genuinely fun!
-Games! Along with casinos galore, there are also normal arcades! Any game you can imagine, it exists.
-Or explore parts of Hell's Hotel that don't involve getting into a dogpile! ]

C) MARCH COMES IN LIKE....(HEAVEN LEVEL)
[TODAY IN HEAVEN THOUGH, there are advertisements for the ZOO!! A zoo in heaven?? Fuck yea!! But when you get there you see nothing but...........lions. And lambs. Just, everywhere. They aren't fighting though, but being super cute and soft and have tiny wings. You can pet them and pick them up--well the lambs at least. The lion might crush you. But you're dead anyway so give it a shot champ!!

Local angels explain that every 'spring' the zoo does this, and it's a sign of good fortune! You might wonder why you need good fortune in Heaven, but fuck it, when it Rome!! If you stick around long enough the zoo will change back to 'normal' and you can find other animals to gawk at.

If zoos aren't your thing though, check out heaven's:
-BEACH!! How is there an ocean and sandy white beach in the sky! Who cares, it's heaven! Beach episode time!
-Coffee shops! There are no coffee shops in hell! LIVE YOUR COFFEE AU DREAMS.
-Or just explore the Heavenly hotel in general!]

D) WILDCARD
[DO WHATEVER ELSE or send text messages on your phone!! ]

OOC NOTES:
-This TDM is open to all! For now, you do NOT need to join the comm to play in it!
-Post questions for the mods here
-Remember, playing in the TDM does NOT guarantee your entry or app being accepted into the game proper later down the line!
-Apps open next Sunday! Be sure to read the rules linked there and check the current taken list!
-For current players: TDMs count as game canon AND threads may be used for AC if you wish!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Sad for you, imp, that Husk considers all of that a tell. As in that tells him you're going to be absolutely slaughtered during this game of poker.

Husk covertly looks at his own cards, mulling over what to do in his head before he makes a low/conservative bet, setting down a couple chips into the pot.]

[Blitzø whistles a tune and shoves a handful of chips in.]

The fuck is an angel doing gambling anyway?

[Wow, raising that much that early, huh? Ballsy move. Husk does notice Blitzø making a nuisance of himself, but if doing so is an intentional distraction, Husk isn't fazed all that much. It takes a moment for someone other than the two to fold and another after that for the fourth person to call on the bet.]

I was a sinner before comin' here and I don't give a s♠♥♣ what I look like on the outside. I was never lookin' for redemption.

[Husk shall call as well.]

Oh shit, you're from the same Hell as me huh?

[The other demon who called doesn't look interesting in the slightest and seeing the fact that this cat fucker is at least from the same neck of the woods... Well Blitzø might actually have to start playing properly.]

Hang on, gotta make my move this round.

[And he draws his gun and shoots the demon that didn't fold in the head.]

Just you and me then! I raise.

[The demon that had folded takes this as its cue to get the fuck out of here. Husk doesn't really react other than smirking a little. This would've been the part where he checked to try and keep the pot a little more manageable, but the game has been changed by the gun-toting imp.]

Stuck in the Pride Ring with all the other sinners and havin' to deal with the extermination every year? Yeah, I could be in the same hell as you.

[Husk will slowly push in ALL of his chips.]

All-in.

[Husk's tone of voice and body language might indicate that this is more bait than bluff.]

Extermination's just a fucking irritation for the rest of us. Gotta crunch to get my client's work done just in case they get turned into mincemeat before they can fucking pay me but otherwise who gives a fuck?

[Blitzø grins, sharp and feral, and pushes his own chips in too.]

Pretty confident that I won't just blow your brains out and then take all the winnings if I lose, aren't you, kitty?

[Clients, huh? And judging from your wording... it sounds to Husk like you kill people. Yeah, this sinner demon doesn't really pay attention to any of your commercials, even if you operate in Pride.

Husk only gives a small chuckle.]

I've been in hell probably long before you were born, kid.

[Husk reaches into his right pocket, grasping a card in between his index and middle fingers, but doesn't take it out just yet..]

Been 'round the block more than a couple times. Now, come on. Reveal what you got.

I mean, no shit. Sinners don't fucking die unless an angel kills you, right? No wonder you types are usually so fucked in the head.

[All because he lives and works in Pride doesn't mean that he doesn't think Sinners are a special kind of fucked up sometimes. More than some other parts of Hell anyway.

Blitzø picks up his cards and fans them out with a practised air. Growing up in the circus he'd learned a few slight of hand tricks for ~~theft~~ showmanship thanks to dear old dad, not that he tends to use them so much now.]

Four of a kind.

It's more like it's the other way around, in a way. You wouldn't expect a sinner all ♠♣♣♥in' hopped up on LSD and H8 to survive an extermination... but yes, that event happenin' every single year can be stressful to a lot of people.

[As for Husk's cards? He doesn't do any fancy flourishes or whatever. This isn't a competition to prove who can do the fancier tricks or whatever. With his left hand, he simply flips over the cards to reveal them.]

Straight flush.

[Husk is ready if that gun gets pointed toward him.]

Yeah, most sinners I deal with are just fucked up extermination or no extermination.

[He figures it has more to do with the dying and being in Hell and suddenly wanting to do all the shit they'd said no to in life because they were fucking stupid, but to each their own.

At the sight of the cards, Blitzø grins wider, raising an eyebrow.]

Pretty fucking ballsy move there. I could ventilate your skull right now.

Yeah, you could try.

[Husk will just go right ahead and use his free hand to start sweeping the chips in the pot to his spot. Are you gonna try, imp? Are you?]

TDM 001!!

Re: Hell

Re: Hell

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CW: Drug talk

Re: CW: Drug talk

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