heckinooc | TDM 001!!

[ SEE GAME NAVIGATION TO READ UP ON HECK GAME BEFORE PLAYING IF YOU SO DESIRE ]

A) MAY I OFFER U PIE IN THIS TRYING TIME(GARDEN LEVEL)
[OOPS YOU DIED. WELCOME TO THE GARDEN OF GOOD AND EVIL. If you're new here, have a sheep cherub or imp slap a "HI MY NAME IS--" sticker on you, and frantically explain "DON'T WORRY, WE'RE WORKING ON IT, WE'LL HAVE YOU OUT HERE....AT...SOME POINT..." Wack. Also, you may noticed that your body may or may not have changed. What's up with that??? Who cares, at least you have as spiffy new cell phone! You're also told you're free to take the elevators up to Heaven or down to Hell. Good luck!

In the mean time--join the garden party that's going on! Or at least, it seems like a party?? Except all they are serving is pie. Apple pie. Blueberry pie. The classics. For you more Carnivorous types, there's stuff like mince pie, and...the name is smudged, but maybe don't eat that one unless you're a cannibal.

But along with a variety of normal pies, if you accidentally eat a weird pie, your character might experience the following:
Vinegar Pie - It's tasty but suddenly you're compelled to blurt out an Insult or ruthlessly tease the next person you see.
"Sweet" Potato - If you're a normally grumpy or aggro character, this pie will suddenly make you want to be more affectionate! This can be anything from wanting to hold hands or saying genuine nice things.
Humble Pie - Suddenly you feel complimenting or praising others and might downplay your own achievements, or insult yourself.

You can probably shake off the effects, but hey. Free pie!! ]

B) LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE (HELL LEVEL)
[TIME TO EXPLORE. Today in the Hell Level, the Hotel (Ho-hell? Helll-tel? Okay just Hotel) it's time for spring cleaning! Wait, didn't they just have that? An Imp says yes, but this is a different type of cleaning. Time to TAKE OUT THE TRASH!!!!

Which is to say, out of no where you might receive a PUNCH in the face by a local, or an imp! If the latter it's like being bapped by a sick little lamb. Still, even if a local punches you, you suddenly heal immediately? That's right, TODAY ONLY, this is a 'get into a scrap injury free' spring holiday, and you can rough house as much as you want with each other today in the Hotel, and NO DAMAGE will remain! Ever wanted to get cut in half and suddenly stitch back together? WELL TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY.

If you're not into PG rated guro however, why don't you try exploring:
-The clubs! The nightlife in hell is FANTASTIC and genuinely fun!
-Games! Along with casinos galore, there are also normal arcades! Any game you can imagine, it exists.
-Or explore parts of Hell's Hotel that don't involve getting into a dogpile! ]

C) MARCH COMES IN LIKE....(HEAVEN LEVEL)
[TODAY IN HEAVEN THOUGH, there are advertisements for the ZOO!! A zoo in heaven?? Fuck yea!! But when you get there you see nothing but...........lions. And lambs. Just, everywhere. They aren't fighting though, but being super cute and soft and have tiny wings. You can pet them and pick them up--well the lambs at least. The lion might crush you. But you're dead anyway so give it a shot champ!!

Local angels explain that every 'spring' the zoo does this, and it's a sign of good fortune! You might wonder why you need good fortune in Heaven, but fuck it, when it Rome!! If you stick around long enough the zoo will change back to 'normal' and you can find other animals to gawk at.

If zoos aren't your thing though, check out heaven's:
-BEACH!! How is there an ocean and sandy white beach in the sky! Who cares, it's heaven! Beach episode time!
-Coffee shops! There are no coffee shops in hell! LIVE YOUR COFFEE AU DREAMS.
-Or just explore the Heavenly hotel in general!]

D) WILDCARD
[DO WHATEVER ELSE or send text messages on your phone!! ]

OOC NOTES:
-This TDM is open to all! For now, you do NOT need to join the comm to play in it!
-Post questions for the mods here
-Remember, playing in the TDM does NOT guarantee your entry or app being accepted into the game proper later down the line!
-Apps open next Sunday! Be sure to read the rules linked there and check the current taken list!
-For current players: TDMs count as game canon AND threads may be used for AC if you wish!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Hey yourself.

[ If she had to show up here with anyone, she could do much worse than him. The censoring has that eyebrow perking up a bit higher as she removes the shades entirely, making a soft clicking sound with her tongue. ]

Harsh. So, you woke up angelic and got relegated to rated PG. Who did you piss off?

[ She is going to conveniently leave out her own changes because, if she can help it, no one is going to see her looking humiliated. Not angels, not demons and definitely not Blitz. ]

I can't contact Tex either, looks like I'm here minus one bodyguard. How about we get the fuck out of here before they realize we're lovers, not fighters?

████, I wish I knew. I mean, the only person I've pissed off lately was Mammon, and this is really above his powers pay grade, you know? Also, I'm preeehehety [ wow i really hated typing that actually, ] sure this wouldn't be the punishment he'd pick for telling him to ████ off.

[ it's chill. it's copacetic. fizz is embarrassed by his own changes so he's not going to pester her about any she may have.

she has a good point though, and finally he nods. ]

Yeah. I don't think we're going to find either of them out here like this, so let's bail.

If he was here everyone would know and I don't think your man would let something like a different Hell stop him from being here to protect his princess. [ A Look because ugh, romance. ] I was wasted, Fizz, and still knew the two of you were fucking at the club.

Ozzie going rage mode on him just let the people in the back know.

[ Linking their arms together, because she's sure as hell not going to get caught running around solo, she leads him away from the angry mob that was creeping closer to them. ]

So, what's sleeping with him like? [ What? Inquiring minds. ]

Everyone knew we were ████ing, that wasn't the problem.

[ it was all the rest. the mushy parts. well no, now everyone knows the mushy parts so those aren't a problem anymore.

he leans into it when she links their arms, wrapping his around hers a couple extra times, then it's time to skedaddle for sure.

then, he solemnly places his free hand over his heart and looks down. ]

A tragedy. Literally anything I could tell you would get censored. I tried to tell a guy earlier and it was absolutely ████ing impossible to get the point across. Or, well, I guess he did get the point, but it was all like 'well his ████ is ████ and ████ ███████! And then we ████ ████ ██████████!!! And holy ████ am I right? ████ that's some good █████!' and he was very supportive of my speech.

TDM 001!!

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when you write tags but forget to post them..

too real