TDM 001!!

[heckinmods]

[ SEE GAME NAVIGATION TO READ UP ON HECK GAME BEFORE PLAYING IF YOU SO DESIRE ]

A) MAY I OFFER U PIE IN THIS TRYING TIME(GARDEN LEVEL)
[OOPS YOU DIED. WELCOME TO THE GARDEN OF GOOD AND EVIL. If you're new here, have a sheep cherub or imp slap a "HI MY NAME IS--" sticker on you, and frantically explain "DON'T WORRY, WE'RE WORKING ON IT, WE'LL HAVE YOU OUT HERE....AT...SOME POINT..." Wack. Also, you may noticed that your body may or may not have changed. What's up with that??? Who cares, at least you have as spiffy new cell phone! You're also told you're free to take the elevators up to Heaven or down to Hell. Good luck!

In the mean time--join the garden party that's going on! Or at least, it seems like a party?? Except all they are serving is pie. Apple pie. Blueberry pie. The classics. For you more Carnivorous types, there's stuff like mince pie, and...the name is smudged, but maybe don't eat that one unless you're a cannibal.

But along with a variety of normal pies, if you accidentally eat a weird pie, your character might experience the following:
Vinegar Pie - It's tasty but suddenly you're compelled to blurt out an Insult or ruthlessly tease the next person you see.
"Sweet" Potato - If you're a normally grumpy or aggro character, this pie will suddenly make you want to be more affectionate! This can be anything from wanting to hold hands or saying genuine nice things.
Humble Pie - Suddenly you feel complimenting or praising others and might downplay your own achievements, or insult yourself.

You can probably shake off the effects, but hey. Free pie!! ]


B) LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE (HELL LEVEL)
[TIME TO EXPLORE. Today in the Hell Level, the Hotel (Ho-hell? Helll-tel? Okay just Hotel) it's time for spring cleaning! Wait, didn't they just have that? An Imp says yes, but this is a different type of cleaning. Time to TAKE OUT THE TRASH!!!!

Which is to say, out of no where you might receive a PUNCH in the face by a local, or an imp! If the latter it's like being bapped by a sick little lamb. Still, even if a local punches you, you suddenly heal immediately? That's right, TODAY ONLY, this is a 'get into a scrap injury free' spring holiday, and you can rough house as much as you want with each other today in the Hotel, and NO DAMAGE will remain! Ever wanted to get cut in half and suddenly stitch back together? WELL TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY.

If you're not into PG rated guro however, why don't you try exploring:
-The clubs! The nightlife in hell is FANTASTIC and genuinely fun!
-Games! Along with casinos galore, there are also normal arcades! Any game you can imagine, it exists.
-Or explore parts of Hell's Hotel that don't involve getting into a dogpile! ]


C) MARCH COMES IN LIKE....(HEAVEN LEVEL)
[TODAY IN HEAVEN THOUGH, there are advertisements for the ZOO!! A zoo in heaven?? Fuck yea!! But when you get there you see nothing but...........lions. And lambs. Just, everywhere. They aren't fighting though, but being super cute and soft and have tiny wings. You can pet them and pick them up--well the lambs at least. The lion might crush you. But you're dead anyway so give it a shot champ!!

Local angels explain that every 'spring' the zoo does this, and it's a sign of good fortune! You might wonder why you need good fortune in Heaven, but fuck it, when it Rome!! If you stick around long enough the zoo will change back to 'normal' and you can find other animals to gawk at.

If zoos aren't your thing though, check out heaven's:
-BEACH!! How is there an ocean and sandy white beach in the sky! Who cares, it's heaven! Beach episode time!
-Coffee shops! There are no coffee shops in hell! LIVE YOUR COFFEE AU DREAMS.
-Or just explore the Heavenly hotel in general!]

D) WILDCARD
[DO WHATEVER ELSE or send text messages on your phone!! ]


OOC NOTES:
-This TDM is open to all! For now, you do NOT need to join the comm to play in it!
-Post questions for the mods here
-Remember, playing in the TDM does NOT guarantee your entry or app being accepted into the game proper later down the line!
-Apps open next Sunday! Be sure to read the rules linked there and check the current taken list!
-For current players: TDMs count as game canon AND threads may be used for AC if you wish!

Comments

[succinainteasy]

(ooc: Totally besties, groaning about the men in their lives and wondering why they have to do all the work. God, it's a curse being this awesome. )

[ Ever the trained star, she finds herself putting on her best look before noticing who snapped the picture. The groan that follows isn't in response to that but rather because her relief is immeasurable. ]

Finally, someone I actually want to see. If I had to choke down another one-liner I was going to gag. These people wouldn't know game if I taped it to the front of my car and ran them over with it.

[ She drums her nails against the side of her glass, resting her chin against her hand after propping her elbow up against the bar top. Before continuing, she winks at her. ]

You can still try your luck with a line, Vel, you a have better shot than they do.

[respectless]

[Velvette grins as Verosika mentions running them over with her car.]

That sounds like the perfect way to educate them on the topic. Repeatedly. At least we'd have a good time.

[And that's all that really matters. There's a very short list of people that Velvette deigns to care about whether things are going well for them or not, and conveniently, every single person on that list has a name that starts with the letter V.]

I'll flip a coin. Heads you're mine, and tails I'm yours.

[succinainteasy]

[ Mischief on the first stay? Absolutely pop star princess behavior. ]

Does that mean you're volunteering to drive me around if I find a car here? If nothing else, think of the tabloids.

[ Tex isn't here to be her chauffeur, she's too pretty and famous to be forced to drive herself around. Plus, she can count the number of people she would trust to drive her around on one hand.

Playing her part in this charade, she leans in with eyes half-lidded and tilts Velvette's chin up with her finger. To any onlooker, it might look like she is seconds away from kissing her. Are people staring at them? Of course they are, they are some hot bitches and she is eating this shit up. ]

Say less, you know I'm yours.

[respectless]

[Velvette typically hires people to do the driving, but given that she's in the process of rebuilding the Vees' media empire, she can accept driving. As long as it's not an ugly car.]

As long as it's a really stylish convertible. If I'm going to get a reputation for being Verosika Mayday's sugar mama, I want to get the look exactly right.

[Is she angling her phone just right to capture this moment for social media? Damn right she is. Let people speculate.]

[succinainteasy]

[ Become her sugar mama, Vel. It's the only correct course of action in this instance. ]

Only the best for us, I wouldn't touch an ugly car with gloves on. Who else could make me look this good but my sugar mama? I'll get back to you on your new pet name.

[ Let them eat cake on social media, just because it's fake Hell doesn't mean they need to settle on being irrelevant. Everyone has a phone here and, judging by the people she's run into, they're as thirsty as the deviants back home. ]

Are you gonna tell me what you've been up to or do I have to beg?

[respectless]

[Oh, Velvette's been poking around at the social media accounts of the established locals and can confirm they're pretty thirsty, albeit their porn scene is lacking. A lot of things are lacking here, really. But that just means that rising up will be quick.]

Don't worry, bae. I'm not going to make you beg...unless you've recently developed a kink for it, of course.

[She's teasing rather than serious, but hey. It never hurts to check in.]

Got here a month ago along with Valentino. We spent some quality time acquiring a new HQ tower recently. Renovations are currently in progress, but at least we've got most of the blood cleaned up now. Took a trip up to heaven because I was curious and ew. Gaudy as shit.

[succinainteasy]

Kink's are more your partner's thing. If I give into kinks in my line of work, they tend to get clingy. You haven't truly suffered until you've had to hear some kid sobbing because you were the best sex he'd ever had.

And ever will have. [ She murmurs while checking her nails. ] Sometimes going topside is so lame.

Did you kill them all or blackmail them? [ They don't simply acquire things; she knows better than that. At the mention of Heaven she grins over at her, raising an eyebrow again. ] You missed out on the beach then. I don't know what was more fun, the beach itself or getting some angels hot under their collars. The little black bikini gets them every time.