heckinooc | TDM 001!!

[ SEE GAME NAVIGATION TO READ UP ON HECK GAME BEFORE PLAYING IF YOU SO DESIRE ]

A) MAY I OFFER U PIE IN THIS TRYING TIME(GARDEN LEVEL)
[OOPS YOU DIED. WELCOME TO THE GARDEN OF GOOD AND EVIL. If you're new here, have a sheep cherub or imp slap a "HI MY NAME IS--" sticker on you, and frantically explain "DON'T WORRY, WE'RE WORKING ON IT, WE'LL HAVE YOU OUT HERE....AT...SOME POINT..." Wack. Also, you may noticed that your body may or may not have changed. What's up with that??? Who cares, at least you have as spiffy new cell phone! You're also told you're free to take the elevators up to Heaven or down to Hell. Good luck!

In the mean time--join the garden party that's going on! Or at least, it seems like a party?? Except all they are serving is pie. Apple pie. Blueberry pie. The classics. For you more Carnivorous types, there's stuff like mince pie, and...the name is smudged, but maybe don't eat that one unless you're a cannibal.

But along with a variety of normal pies, if you accidentally eat a weird pie, your character might experience the following:
Vinegar Pie - It's tasty but suddenly you're compelled to blurt out an Insult or ruthlessly tease the next person you see.
"Sweet" Potato - If you're a normally grumpy or aggro character, this pie will suddenly make you want to be more affectionate! This can be anything from wanting to hold hands or saying genuine nice things.
Humble Pie - Suddenly you feel complimenting or praising others and might downplay your own achievements, or insult yourself.

You can probably shake off the effects, but hey. Free pie!! ]

B) LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE (HELL LEVEL)
[TIME TO EXPLORE. Today in the Hell Level, the Hotel (Ho-hell? Helll-tel? Okay just Hotel) it's time for spring cleaning! Wait, didn't they just have that? An Imp says yes, but this is a different type of cleaning. Time to TAKE OUT THE TRASH!!!!

Which is to say, out of no where you might receive a PUNCH in the face by a local, or an imp! If the latter it's like being bapped by a sick little lamb. Still, even if a local punches you, you suddenly heal immediately? That's right, TODAY ONLY, this is a 'get into a scrap injury free' spring holiday, and you can rough house as much as you want with each other today in the Hotel, and NO DAMAGE will remain! Ever wanted to get cut in half and suddenly stitch back together? WELL TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY.

If you're not into PG rated guro however, why don't you try exploring:
-The clubs! The nightlife in hell is FANTASTIC and genuinely fun!
-Games! Along with casinos galore, there are also normal arcades! Any game you can imagine, it exists.
-Or explore parts of Hell's Hotel that don't involve getting into a dogpile! ]

C) MARCH COMES IN LIKE....(HEAVEN LEVEL)
[TODAY IN HEAVEN THOUGH, there are advertisements for the ZOO!! A zoo in heaven?? Fuck yea!! But when you get there you see nothing but...........lions. And lambs. Just, everywhere. They aren't fighting though, but being super cute and soft and have tiny wings. You can pet them and pick them up--well the lambs at least. The lion might crush you. But you're dead anyway so give it a shot champ!!

Local angels explain that every 'spring' the zoo does this, and it's a sign of good fortune! You might wonder why you need good fortune in Heaven, but fuck it, when it Rome!! If you stick around long enough the zoo will change back to 'normal' and you can find other animals to gawk at.

If zoos aren't your thing though, check out heaven's:
-BEACH!! How is there an ocean and sandy white beach in the sky! Who cares, it's heaven! Beach episode time!
-Coffee shops! There are no coffee shops in hell! LIVE YOUR COFFEE AU DREAMS.
-Or just explore the Heavenly hotel in general!]

D) WILDCARD
[DO WHATEVER ELSE or send text messages on your phone!! ]

OOC NOTES:
-This TDM is open to all! For now, you do NOT need to join the comm to play in it!
-Post questions for the mods here
-Remember, playing in the TDM does NOT guarantee your entry or app being accepted into the game proper later down the line!
-Apps open next Sunday! Be sure to read the rules linked there and check the current taken list!
-For current players: TDMs count as game canon AND threads may be used for AC if you wish!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Instead of being annoyed, Beetlejuice waggles his eyebrows and catches his tongue in his teeth.]

If you want, big guy!

[ a sloooow squint. ]

I've heard better come-ons.

[ Beetlejuice flings his arms forward and them drops them at his sides. ]

Oh, gimmi a break, I had a long day! You do one better! I'm waiting!

[ all right, all right. if he had real knuckles he'd be cracking them right now. he's gonna do this. ]

It's 'cause you don't have any rizz, ███hole.

[ and then he's stepping in close, gripping beetlejuice's chin with a cool metal hand and tipping it down toward him. he makes himself a little taller too, so they're on an almost even level. look, he's short, he needs the help. ]

Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes, big guy?

[ BJ's mossy brows spring up in surprise as he feels the caress of an unfeeling mechanical hand. His eyes flutter a little. It's something! He'll take it! He has to shake his head to bring himself back to his senses.]

Ohohoho! Good one! You've done this before! My turn.

[ The angel sweeps Fizzarolli up with both hands and whirls around with him before leaning him down into a dip. A rose appears with a fart sound and he catches it in his teeth before bouncing his brows.]

Eh? Eh? Pretty good?

Well, when you live in the lust ring...

[ okay his arms flail a little when he's abruptly manhandled much more than he just manhandled beetlejuice, and his eyes go a little wide—but the stupid fart sound makes him laugh despite himself, covering his mouth with a hand to hide how wide his grin is spreading. ]

Childish, but points for creativity.

[ The laugh has him grinning victoriously. He starts to chew the rose and it slowly disappears into his mouth where he swallows it. ]

Hey, you're only as old as you feel! Tell me about this lust ring. Sounds like my kinda place.

[ He leans back up and releases Fizzarolli. Beetlejuice preens a little, adjusting his halo and smoothing out his sequined tie. ]

Edited 2024-03-20 05:10 (UTC)

[ fizz dusts himself off once he's back on the ground, then arches an eyebrow slightly. ]

I mean, it's the ring of Hell that's based around lust. Asmodeus runs the place, he's the Sin of lust. [ he sounds DREAMY when he says it. absolutely smitten. ] Anyway, it's about what it sounds like! The clubs, the sex scene, toy factories, all that. There are non-sex things, obviously, but the overall theme, you know? I've lived there for a hot minute, so I've heard it all.

[ Beetlejuice nods as he listens. He's instantly jealous. What a place to live! But he's reminded that now he can freely roam and talk to people and get into all kinds of mischeif! At least for now. What if...they fixed the mistake. Oh no! No, no, no, he doesn't want to go back to the world of the living!]

[ His eyes drift slightly apart as he follows this train of thought.]

No kiddin...

[ He recollects himself and shoves his hands in his pockets. A thought crosses his mind amidst the cobwebs. Fizzarolli said he'd been born in his version of Hell. Didn't sound like he got to see much of the heavyside layer. ]

I'm banned from the zoo but I heard there are some pretty sweet spots Upstairs. Anybody gives you any trouble for bein' outta your neighborhood I'll kill 'em.

Wow, uh... [ why is he blushing about that?! maybe it's the fact that fizz can't fight to save his life, literally, that gets him a little flustered when someone says they'll protect him.

he's soooooo glad his makeup covers more than all his scarring. ] ... Really nice of you.

I'm... technically an angel now, I guess, but it feels wrong up there, and my best friend is still down here, so I've been kind of... Hanging out down here even though I stick out like nobody's business now. I don't belong up there anyway. Besides, what if I'm up there and I miss Asmodeus?

Well hey! I don't know how long I got in this dimension! Fuck me if I'm gonna piss it all away by myself!

[ He doesn't have anybody to miss so he can't really relate. But he's enjoying his time with this pointy little clown man. He doesn't want it to end. ]

Big fan of this guy, huh?

Yeah, I guess if your life is ████ outside of here, in which case my condolences, then that makes sense. But really, thanks.

[ then he flushes even MORE when did he get this EMBARRASSED ]

Uh, yeah. He's my boyfriend.

[ yes, this clown pulls the SIN OF LUST as his boyfriend. he's got game. ]

[ Beetlejuice's feathers fluff up just a little. He's...never been given condolences before. He doesn't know what to do with them! Luckily, he's quickly distracted. With a big grin he elbows Fizzerolli.]

Look at you hooking up with one of the top dogs! Nice!

[ okay, now THIS is a conversation he is READY to have. ]

Talk about BIG, am I right? He's seriously got the biggest ████, just the BIGGEST ████, and he's like, you know, █████ █████ █████ and he █████, it's soooo awesome, ████ ████████ ██████! ████ ██████ just completely ███████ wild. Shoot me the ████ up into the ███████ rafters like a slinky, it's that great.

[ BUDDY. ]

[ Beetlejuice continues to grin and nod along with the clown's heavily redacted story but he gets it. He gets the gist. And he eats that up with a spoon. ]

Fuck yeah! Fuck yeah! Fuck yeah! Get it you jingly little freak! That's what I'm looking for! He wouldn't happen to have a brother--or a sister--would he? I am so available.

I meeeaaaaan, there are all the other sins, but, you know! The one no one ever sees, the one that you reeeaaally don't want to deal with because he's an absolute ████, then of course there are the rest... Like, I'm not talking ████ but some of them are messy and not in a fun way.

[ he is ONLY saying this because his boyfriend is lust so he's definitely allowed. or something. ]

Like! Cool, they're my guy's sort-of fam, but boy.

Oh, I can do messy!

[ He wiggles his fingers in excitement. ]

So how'd you land your guy, huh? Most folks I know don't really dig clowns.

I dunno, like I said, not a fun messy. Well, Bee's fun messy, but she's dating some guy. Dunno if they're exclusive, you know? Not everyone's like Oz 'n me.

[ he considers. reeeaaally considers. ]

We worked together first. My ex-boss introduced us and it went from there. I really lucked out. Guess I gotta thank that jackhole for something.

[ Beetlejuice strokes his beard thoughtfully as he listens. He then takes on a southern drawl as he makes his next comment. ]

Well y'know what they say, th' Lord moves in mysterious ways.

TDM 001!!

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject