TDM 001!!

[heckinmods]

[ SEE GAME NAVIGATION TO READ UP ON HECK GAME BEFORE PLAYING IF YOU SO DESIRE ]

A) MAY I OFFER U PIE IN THIS TRYING TIME(GARDEN LEVEL)
[OOPS YOU DIED. WELCOME TO THE GARDEN OF GOOD AND EVIL. If you're new here, have a sheep cherub or imp slap a "HI MY NAME IS--" sticker on you, and frantically explain "DON'T WORRY, WE'RE WORKING ON IT, WE'LL HAVE YOU OUT HERE....AT...SOME POINT..." Wack. Also, you may noticed that your body may or may not have changed. What's up with that??? Who cares, at least you have as spiffy new cell phone! You're also told you're free to take the elevators up to Heaven or down to Hell. Good luck!

In the mean time--join the garden party that's going on! Or at least, it seems like a party?? Except all they are serving is pie. Apple pie. Blueberry pie. The classics. For you more Carnivorous types, there's stuff like mince pie, and...the name is smudged, but maybe don't eat that one unless you're a cannibal.

But along with a variety of normal pies, if you accidentally eat a weird pie, your character might experience the following:
Vinegar Pie - It's tasty but suddenly you're compelled to blurt out an Insult or ruthlessly tease the next person you see.
"Sweet" Potato - If you're a normally grumpy or aggro character, this pie will suddenly make you want to be more affectionate! This can be anything from wanting to hold hands or saying genuine nice things.
Humble Pie - Suddenly you feel complimenting or praising others and might downplay your own achievements, or insult yourself.

You can probably shake off the effects, but hey. Free pie!! ]


B) LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE (HELL LEVEL)
[TIME TO EXPLORE. Today in the Hell Level, the Hotel (Ho-hell? Helll-tel? Okay just Hotel) it's time for spring cleaning! Wait, didn't they just have that? An Imp says yes, but this is a different type of cleaning. Time to TAKE OUT THE TRASH!!!!

Which is to say, out of no where you might receive a PUNCH in the face by a local, or an imp! If the latter it's like being bapped by a sick little lamb. Still, even if a local punches you, you suddenly heal immediately? That's right, TODAY ONLY, this is a 'get into a scrap injury free' spring holiday, and you can rough house as much as you want with each other today in the Hotel, and NO DAMAGE will remain! Ever wanted to get cut in half and suddenly stitch back together? WELL TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY.

If you're not into PG rated guro however, why don't you try exploring:
-The clubs! The nightlife in hell is FANTASTIC and genuinely fun!
-Games! Along with casinos galore, there are also normal arcades! Any game you can imagine, it exists.
-Or explore parts of Hell's Hotel that don't involve getting into a dogpile! ]


C) MARCH COMES IN LIKE....(HEAVEN LEVEL)
[TODAY IN HEAVEN THOUGH, there are advertisements for the ZOO!! A zoo in heaven?? Fuck yea!! But when you get there you see nothing but...........lions. And lambs. Just, everywhere. They aren't fighting though, but being super cute and soft and have tiny wings. You can pet them and pick them up--well the lambs at least. The lion might crush you. But you're dead anyway so give it a shot champ!!

Local angels explain that every 'spring' the zoo does this, and it's a sign of good fortune! You might wonder why you need good fortune in Heaven, but fuck it, when it Rome!! If you stick around long enough the zoo will change back to 'normal' and you can find other animals to gawk at.

If zoos aren't your thing though, check out heaven's:
-BEACH!! How is there an ocean and sandy white beach in the sky! Who cares, it's heaven! Beach episode time!
-Coffee shops! There are no coffee shops in hell! LIVE YOUR COFFEE AU DREAMS.
-Or just explore the Heavenly hotel in general!]

D) WILDCARD
[DO WHATEVER ELSE or send text messages on your phone!! ]


OOC NOTES:
-This TDM is open to all! For now, you do NOT need to join the comm to play in it!
-Post questions for the mods here
-Remember, playing in the TDM does NOT guarantee your entry or app being accepted into the game proper later down the line!
-Apps open next Sunday! Be sure to read the rules linked there and check the current taken list!
-For current players: TDMs count as game canon AND threads may be used for AC if you wish!

Comments

[bugbeverage]

Oh, you know... [ He holds up fingers as he counts aloud. ] Sex, drugs, sex while on drugs, good music, good food...I wanna live it up! You know--for a dead guy.

[ At the mention of Greed's soon to be den of sin, his eyes sparkle a little. ]

Oh yeah? How soon is soon? I'm itchin' for some action here.

[noctuagoetia]

Oh! Apologies! I didn't see you there.

[The leggy demon lifted his 'stilts' carefully so not to accidently trample the poor soul. He was used to towering most people but he paused as he gave the hellhound... angel? a once over. Was he a hybrid? Shaking his head, Stolas turned his attention to his own legs, giving the boy a little half turn.]

Saddle with? I guess went I was younger they were shorter, but I like to think I've grown into them. [The owl chuckled to himself.] I take it that this isn't your true form, then?

[noctuagoetia]

[The imps that held the prince captive instantly dropped the owl onto his bony butt with a small hoot. Lifting his head to see his savior, the goetia blinked surprised to see the angelic feline before him. Well wasn't this an interesting turn of events? But he called him a goetian so he knew what he was... Must be from his Hell.]

So you know who I am? Thank you for the rescue. [Stolas raised his bound wrists to the offered helping paw.] Would your handy cards be able to cut these?

[grumpface]

[Yeah, Husk was not a happy camper when he took the nametag off.]

The Vees and the Radio Demon are here, but that's all. Just that should be manageable. You see any of the Sins around? Or Charlie?

[noctuagoetia]

[Go ahead, take your time glancing up. It was been a reaction he has quite familiar with. There was rarely a demon that could rival his height. As the young girl took a moment to find her voice, Stolas simply just smiled politely down at her.]

Have you now? Wonderful! [Stolas clasped his talons together.] When you say you've been here long, how long might that be? Weeks? Months? I'm sure this place is lovely but I would very much like to return home as soon as I can.

[grumpface]

sounds like a good plan will do
are you also gonna go after all the socializing media or whatever the ♣♣♥♠ its called too

[Boomer alert. Well, not so much a boomer because he died in the 1970s.]

[grumpface]

[Husk retracts the helping paw in order to fish a card out of his pocket and easily cut the ropes. So yes. Yes, they can. Husk smirks a little.]

...Prince... Stolas, right? We don't see any of you up in Pride all that much.

[Husk puts the card away and offers the helping paw again.]

[darkweb]

I don't think I caught all of that...

[Are words broken? Hard to understand accent?? He moves on from it.]

But, thanks for your time at least!

You've been to Hell before?

[bbbrightside]

[It's a far cry from the talking ravens Ruby had come to know in her life. Edgar and Allen were taller than her, sure, but not this tall. And Poe was... well, he was a special friend that brought a slight smile to her face in fond remembrance.]

I guess it would have to be... close to a month now? [Her smile is apologetic.] The people running this say that there's some "complications" they're working out, but that's all we know so far.

[scitwi]

I-I wouldn't-- I'd-- [Says the girl who spent the better part of a year doing exactly that. The mortifying ordeal of being known is making her face beet fucking red.]

What is fun about this?

[scitwi]

Both would be considered correct. "Magitech" is an apt term, though. Putting that away in my mental rolodex.

Are you more magically inclined?

[supersaver]

Huh? OH!!
Oh, no, no...sorry. 'Quirk' is a global term used in my world that means "individuality".
The scientific term is called: metahuman ability. Or, I guess, superpower would be the closest definition.

Not really magic as I know it, but more of a genetic trait that causes specialized effects per individual.

No, I can't do portals, my quirk deals with gravity...sorry.

[darkweb]

that's right!

sadly it was my queen who set up the portal network in floralia

but i probably could do the same if i did some research and study

Trash like she's going to catch him lol

[succinainteasy]

Hey boys.

[ Stolas remains the prize for less than thirty seconds before the lead captor trips over a razor-sharp stiletto that has been purposely placed in his path and the others trip over him, falling like dominos. The landing will be rough but at least he's no longer in danger of being carted off to Satan knows where, he just has to be face to face with his boy toy's ex. She places a finger under the ringleader's chin to tip it skyward, bringing her lips impossibly close to his before whispering. ]

This one is mine, find someone else to play with.

[ The clicking of her heels leads her in a semi-circle around him before she crouches down in his line of sight and removes her sunglasses. While the expression splashed across her face it isn't quite amusement, it's close enough. After the impromptu roast at Ozzie's, she wasn't expecting to see him again so soon. It isn't altruism that led her to helping him but a morbid sense of curiosity, to meet the newest idiot to fall under that nasty little gremlin's spell. ]

Having a rough day, Your Highness?

[succinainteasy]

[ She just stares at the hat. Was that supposed to impress her? ]

Isn't it obvious? I came, I saw, and I conquered. If I'm stuck in this dumpster fire, I'm going to find a better place than this to hang out at. I have standards.

[ Which is exactly why she'll be stepping around him, blowing him a kiss before she grabs his hat and plops it on top of his head, tugging it down over his eyes. ]

Enjoy your lap dance, big guy.

[technicaldifficulties]

[ he looks relieved that the locals have opted to fuck off, because while he doesn't doubt that val had things under control it would be advantageous to gang up on and ( attempt to ) beat the shit out of an overlord. more of those little shits were beginning to show up, and it wouldn't be out of the question for a turning of the rides. ]

Good, now that's what I want to hear. [ his smile broadens as he fixes his fluffy neck collar right before he stands to full height and re-adjusts his wings. ] Oh? And what's this new venture?

[ he snaps his fingers to form a spark at the tip of his cigarette, a little heart rising out of the smoke the following instant. ]

[succinainteasy]

[ Veneer now has the distinct honor of being the first one to make her smile here, all while she is stretching out and posing as if expecting the paparazzi to pop out of the sand and start snapping pictures. Considering the first thing she was faced with upon arrival was horse legs and anonymity, being complimented goes a long way to earning him favor.

It simultaneously triggers some intrusive thoughts, namely wondering if she should test her skills on him. ]

A feather boa at a beach, that's a bold choice. It's a good look.

[technicaldifficulties]

[ she might be able to feel his deadpan expression through her phone, or maybe that's just his face, because, hello, hi, he's just zapping himself over. ] Riiiight. I'm going to remember that you said that, Velvette. [ so you better make good on your promise.

[ but on business! which instantly has him perking up. ] Oh, that's good, I like that. I bet we'll find all sorts of 'talent' here to exploit. Do we have a new tower or... even a building? [ where is our new headquarters located? ]

Oh, that reminds me, ...that prick Alastor is doing some shitty radio show, so we'll need to get the 666 News back on the air, which means we're going to need a new Anchor. Somebody that's got attitude.

[succinainteasy]

Blitzo-

[ Her disgust is palpable and her initial pleasure dissolves into a familiar sneer, eyes narrowing a fraction before she slips into something a bit more comfortable, utter contempt. She slides out of her chair and rests a hand against her hip, using the other to gesture vaguely. ]

I knew this place was trash, they scraped the bottom of the barrel when they employed you. Then again.. you're good at cleaning every mess but the ones you make myself. Don't get cocky you little shit, you're half a step above a janitor as usual.

[ With that said she moves to step by him, shoulder checking him like the mature adult she. As far as she's concerned this conversation is over and done with, she doesn't need to stick around to watch him fail miserably at his job. Been there, done that, got the fucking tattoo. ]

3-C.

[technicaldifficulties]

Prince Stolas, huh... [ hmmmm. ] I'm afraid Hell has gone to hell. Looks like everything's been twist-turn-upsidedown and we're being made to start over. Fun, I know, but... go on, what's this matter of yours?

[ magic shmagic,
spill the tea. ]

1/3

[technicaldifficulties]

[technicaldifficulties]

[ ...wat. ]

[succinainteasy]

Clerical bullshit is more like it, those fuzzy little rats are about as useful as my bodyguard right now.

[ After promptly swiveling around in her seat she leans forward with her lips pursed slightly towards him. It's enough to make a normal man's mouth water, she is more than aware of her best angles, but this is Valentino. In this respect, her movements are less intention and more natural.

She is a fan of his work, after all. Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back. ]

Are you trying to butter me up, Valentino? It's working.

[technicaldifficulties]

Do you want a horse show? Do you want to star in a horse show? I can make that happen, you know. All you've got to do is say the word.

[succinainteasy]

Word of advice. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is. They tell you what you want to hear to get you off their backs. Like giving candy to a baby, that's showbiz.

[ She takes a moment to flip through her phone, lips pressing into a thin, disappointed line when she's unable to find the people she's looking for. ]

They'd remember you, who cares what they think? Conformity is for losers.