TDM 001!!

[heckinmods]

[ SEE GAME NAVIGATION TO READ UP ON HECK GAME BEFORE PLAYING IF YOU SO DESIRE ]

A) MAY I OFFER U PIE IN THIS TRYING TIME(GARDEN LEVEL)
[OOPS YOU DIED. WELCOME TO THE GARDEN OF GOOD AND EVIL. If you're new here, have a sheep cherub or imp slap a "HI MY NAME IS--" sticker on you, and frantically explain "DON'T WORRY, WE'RE WORKING ON IT, WE'LL HAVE YOU OUT HERE....AT...SOME POINT..." Wack. Also, you may noticed that your body may or may not have changed. What's up with that??? Who cares, at least you have as spiffy new cell phone! You're also told you're free to take the elevators up to Heaven or down to Hell. Good luck!

In the mean time--join the garden party that's going on! Or at least, it seems like a party?? Except all they are serving is pie. Apple pie. Blueberry pie. The classics. For you more Carnivorous types, there's stuff like mince pie, and...the name is smudged, but maybe don't eat that one unless you're a cannibal.

But along with a variety of normal pies, if you accidentally eat a weird pie, your character might experience the following:
Vinegar Pie - It's tasty but suddenly you're compelled to blurt out an Insult or ruthlessly tease the next person you see.
"Sweet" Potato - If you're a normally grumpy or aggro character, this pie will suddenly make you want to be more affectionate! This can be anything from wanting to hold hands or saying genuine nice things.
Humble Pie - Suddenly you feel complimenting or praising others and might downplay your own achievements, or insult yourself.

You can probably shake off the effects, but hey. Free pie!! ]


B) LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE (HELL LEVEL)
[TIME TO EXPLORE. Today in the Hell Level, the Hotel (Ho-hell? Helll-tel? Okay just Hotel) it's time for spring cleaning! Wait, didn't they just have that? An Imp says yes, but this is a different type of cleaning. Time to TAKE OUT THE TRASH!!!!

Which is to say, out of no where you might receive a PUNCH in the face by a local, or an imp! If the latter it's like being bapped by a sick little lamb. Still, even if a local punches you, you suddenly heal immediately? That's right, TODAY ONLY, this is a 'get into a scrap injury free' spring holiday, and you can rough house as much as you want with each other today in the Hotel, and NO DAMAGE will remain! Ever wanted to get cut in half and suddenly stitch back together? WELL TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY.

If you're not into PG rated guro however, why don't you try exploring:
-The clubs! The nightlife in hell is FANTASTIC and genuinely fun!
-Games! Along with casinos galore, there are also normal arcades! Any game you can imagine, it exists.
-Or explore parts of Hell's Hotel that don't involve getting into a dogpile! ]


C) MARCH COMES IN LIKE....(HEAVEN LEVEL)
[TODAY IN HEAVEN THOUGH, there are advertisements for the ZOO!! A zoo in heaven?? Fuck yea!! But when you get there you see nothing but...........lions. And lambs. Just, everywhere. They aren't fighting though, but being super cute and soft and have tiny wings. You can pet them and pick them up--well the lambs at least. The lion might crush you. But you're dead anyway so give it a shot champ!!

Local angels explain that every 'spring' the zoo does this, and it's a sign of good fortune! You might wonder why you need good fortune in Heaven, but fuck it, when it Rome!! If you stick around long enough the zoo will change back to 'normal' and you can find other animals to gawk at.

If zoos aren't your thing though, check out heaven's:
-BEACH!! How is there an ocean and sandy white beach in the sky! Who cares, it's heaven! Beach episode time!
-Coffee shops! There are no coffee shops in hell! LIVE YOUR COFFEE AU DREAMS.
-Or just explore the Heavenly hotel in general!]

D) WILDCARD
[DO WHATEVER ELSE or send text messages on your phone!! ]


OOC NOTES:
-This TDM is open to all! For now, you do NOT need to join the comm to play in it!
-Post questions for the mods here
-Remember, playing in the TDM does NOT guarantee your entry or app being accepted into the game proper later down the line!
-Apps open next Sunday! Be sure to read the rules linked there and check the current taken list!
-For current players: TDMs count as game canon AND threads may be used for AC if you wish!

Comments

Hell

[not_a_possum]

[Is that...Fizzarolli? The clown that mocked him on his and his wife's anniversary? He considers just ignoring him, maybe sneaking off before he's noticed, but instead...he sighs. And then speaks even though he's not the one Fizz is talking to.]

I don't think Asmodeus is anywhere around here. I'm pretty sure I'd have noticed, considering his...well, everything.

[Moxxie looks him over.]

How did you end up with a halo, anyway? You didn't strike me as the angelic sort.

[deerlisteners]

"Art", hm? Is it art like splattering paint on a canvas is considered "modern" art? [he waves a hand dismissively] There is nothing that finds its home in a circus that can be even remotely considered art. Entertainment, yes. Art? Harumph.

[noctuagoetia]

[The shots rang out and the imps that help the prince prompted dropped him square on his ass with a little shocked hoot. Stolas didn't even need to turn his head to know who had been behind his rescue. There was no mistaking that voice. Even so, he still spun to look at the imp.]

Blitz?

[Was all he was able to breath out. So, he was stuck in this place too. Though current he seemed to be enjoying being here as he charged the hotel staff. For a moment, Stolas forgot about everything. Forgot about how long it had been since he saw him in the flesh. Forgot about how awkward things felt between them. Watching Blitzø mow through his would-be captors....Fuck, it was such a huge turn on. It was always a privilege to watch him work. If his legs weren't currently bound together, he would have used them to wrap around that-

No no no... Focus.

Shaking his head, he pushed those thoughts aside. Blitzø was right, he was powerful. If he was really in trouble, he could get out of this easily. Again he tried to shift into his true form which should have been as natural as breathing but again, it felt like there was a hand around his neck, preventing him from talking a gulp. This time, only the tips of his feathers turned inky black and nothing more. Well.... this was a problem...

While both were distracted, Stolas by his thoughts and Blitzø by the fight, another sneaky little imp crept up to lift the still restrained goetia. Tossing the prince over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, he tried to make a speedy retreat down the hall.]

Not to be a bother, but would you be a dear and untie me? [Stolas called back to Blitzø.]

SORRY FOR THE DELAY

[deerlisteners]

I know Valentino has been acquiring talent, but considering that I haven't seen any giant, tacky, neon-covered towers, I don't think they've managed what I have, yet.

[ah... nostalgic... or whatever the word for be for something that happened like a week ago. He catches it and incinerates it] Well, do what you will, old friend. But just remember when you're floundering that it was I who offered the olive branch first.

[noctuagoetia]

Oh! Moxxie! How could I forget one of my saviors from that nasty little assassination attempt? I don't think I ever fully showed my gratitude for what you and your wife had done for me.

But! There will be time for that later. I only just got here myself however I do know one thing. This isn't our Hell. I don't have access to all my powers which has been... troubling. I might need of your services again.

[princess_of_hell]

Um, they let me out of the elevator a little while ago, actually! At first I thought you had done some renovations to the hotel!

[She'll release.]

But, I'm really glad I ran into you! It feels like we've got a full house, here! Or, a full hotel!

[she's visibly and audibly giddy about the situation.]

[outrageon]

[Good to know there's a Greed to be worried about. Vel's sure she knows which is the superior greed.]

Wait— so you really just got here? Are they still messing this stuff up? _{Talk about slacking off.}

[does she have the right to talk about slacking off...]

[twominutes]

[ oh wait, it's that one guy. oh wait, he was a dick to this one guy.

thing is, fizz looks absolutely nothing like he did that night even aside from the angel getup. he looks anxious, and tired, and his brows are all furrowed up, tail wrapped around his legs. like he's lost, or something worse. ]

... Yeah. If Oz were here, people would've noticed him. I'm barkin' up the wrong tree asking around.

[ and he would've found fizz already. right? oz always finds him. always fixes things. or, well, blitzø's saved him one time too, now.

right. anyway. he's being a fucking weirdo. he shrugs at the question, flicking his own halo in annoyance. ]

Didn't even know Hellborn could be angels! ████'s ████ed. It's not like we're Sinners that have any ████ to be redeemed for, right? At least not in a Heaven way. Also, this censorship ████ ████ing blows.

Re: Hell

[twominutes]

[ okaaaay, so that's actually a pretty cool show. he's impressed, entertainer to entertainer.

but hey, the guy also tried to answer his question, so points! ]

Yeah, you could say that. If he's here he'd be looking for me.

[deerlisteners]

My goodness, no. You know this isn't my style. [not nearly enough deer skulls and taxidermy alligators] It's almost like a knock-off of our precious hotel, don't you think?

[twominutes]

[ okay, now THIS is a conversation he is READY to have. ]

Talk about BIG, am I right? He's seriously got the biggest ████, just the BIGGEST ████, and he's like, you know, █████ █████ █████ and he █████, it's soooo awesome, ████ ████████ ██████! ████ ██████ just completely ███████ wild. Shoot me the ████ up into the ███████ rafters like a slinky, it's that great.

[ BUDDY. ]

garden :)

[deerlisteners]

[casually strolling by, he tapes one of his flyers to her flank and says nothing]

[noctuagoetia]

[There was a moment of hesitation. Maybe he shouldn't be blabbing about his own teensy weensy problem of not being able to access his true strength... Being a target of another assassination attempt was not on his to-do list.]

That I can agree on. This Hell is certainly not MY Hell.

It's just been an observation, really. You wouldn't happen to have special abilities, would you?

[princess_of_hell]

[her own pain is starting to fade, but she attributes it to adrenaline.]

Um... not to nag, and of course, you know, in extreme situations it's okay to resort to violence as self-defense... but wouldn't it be a bit better to... oh, I dunno... just sort of look to more peaceful solutions?

Here, I'll try! You kicked me in the face... and that's totally okay! I know you were just a little lost in the middle of your fight, or... a lot lost in your fight. See? I just put myself in your own circumstances. Now I'm free of any violent thoughts! I've got plenty of time to use on other, productive things!

I could sing a song, or take a walk, or stay inside and watch a movie... I'm free!

[bugbeverage]

[ Beetlejuice continues to grin and nod along with the clown's heavily redacted story but he gets it. He gets the gist. And he eats that up with a spoon. ]

Fuck yeah! Fuck yeah! Fuck yeah! Get it you jingly little freak! That's what I'm looking for! He wouldn't happen to have a brother--or a sister--would he? I am so available.

[princess_of_hell]

[She's just excited she got that hug. She'll let herself get led out.]

Husk, if you're running on empty maybe all you need is a little refill!

[...]

--Not of booze! This metaphor would be confined to completely non-alcoholic drinks. Actually, let's just say water. The water glass may be half-empty, but that only means you have the capacity to refill it!

[gasps]

There's a song in there, somewhere. I know it!

[princess_of_hell]

Well.... our hotel had less fighting.

[pause]

Okay, maybe not, but the fighting was usually outside.

Lol you whore

[noctuagoetia]

[One second he was on top of the world, but then the next as his imp captors toppled like bowling pins, the goetian prince found himself falling face first into the scratchy tacky print carpet. It took him a moment to figure out what had happened as he just sat there a moment crumpled up like an accordion, ass up. Blinking away his shock, he scooted his knees under him, using his bound hands to push himself up into a sitting position to stare back at the succubus.

Wait.

He knew her. Or rather... he saw her. That night at Ozzie's. She was there. One of Blitzø's bitter exes from the sound of it. What was her name again? Victoria? Veronica? Oh! No! Verosika. What was she doing here?]

I guess you can say that. [He gave her a small chuckle and a polite smile.] Thank you none the less. I don't know where they were taking me. You... wouldn't have anything to help with these?

[Stolas raised his bound wrist for her to inspect.]

[nestingdevil]

Ah - ? Why are you sorry? [Greed lowers his head to snatch both cigarettes on the points of his teeth.] Sounds like a pretty rough deal to me. Don't worry about it.

[Casually, he draws a match up the side of his thigh, causing the tip of it to pop open with a blaze of fire and a hint of silver-spun smoke. Lust. Now, that's one he does know, but this isn't the same person. The Sin lazily arches one of his eyebrows and as he lifts the match to his face, he sucks at the filters of both cigarettes to churn their tips a cherry red.]

[He tosses the match to the curb a second later.] I knew a Lust before, but we're definitely not talking about the same person. [And she's far, far, from dating material. More a stabber than a lover.] Asmodeus - no, I haven't heard that name yet. [Once the smokes are good and lit to his satisfaction, he pinches one out from his jaws and flips it over so the filter is facing Fizz.]

Not sure if you're the smoking type, but - [He lets it hang there as a silent offer.] - think you could make an exception this time.

[noctuagoetia]

I suppose it never occurred to me to count how many rooms there are. There's quite a few. There's my library, the master bedroom, a couple spare guest rooms, my daughter's room, the ball room, throne room, kitchen, dining room, living room, several baths, the vaults... my green house.... I'm sure I'm missing a few.

I live with my daughter, though she goes to her mother's over the weekends, and just a handful of staff. Why do you ask?

[anatani_chikarawo]

[ Aha. She's the type who gets all puffed up over flattery - Tiffa's met a wide variety of people that she's had to navigate, after all. ]

What colors are you used to? I imagine lots of other colors look good on you.

Hell(o) Level

[saltwatertraffy]

[Law spares her a glance before turning back to his plain old booze-on-the rocks drink.]

I seem to remember being taught that it's just where you ended up if you did have too much fun... If anything, it's just louder than upstairs.

[But here he is anyway, despite the obvious little glowing halo floating over his fluffy hat.]

[kuchisake_shojo]

But I'm having a lot of fun - ah, that punch is going to miss too.

[ It's just an imp anyways. Anyone strong could probably turn Runa into paste, not that that has any real repercussions right now.

And the punch misses. The imp looks like it missed on purpose, then goes back to being frustrated about it. ]

Are you sure you don't just want a swing? I can make sure it lands.

Arrival

[anatani_chikarawo]

[ TIFFA ADILL - a delicate-looking girl with four slender wings forming an X at her back, with a halo that glows with moonlight - nods, silent for a moment. ]

...I am not even sure how I supposedly 'went'.

[grumpface]

Yeah, I got that part.

[It stands to reason if Husk wasn't owned by Alastor anymore, then Angel wouldn't be owned by Valentino.]

But I ain't a knight. Just someone who doesn't wanna see him lose all the progress he's made. And a good drinkin' buddy.